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I want to go to sleep with somebody beside me who won’t be gone in the morning. I want to share cigarettes and coffee, watch old movies and hold hands in parks. I want somebody to touch my cheek and tell me they love me, and mean it with everything that they are. I want hugs that last for hours until we both fall asleep. I want kisses that make me feel so much I could cry. And I do cry thinking about it, this love I’ll probably never have. You’ve always told me that love must be like a hurricane, sweeping away everything safe and leaving you exposed, with only trust protecting you. I think that’s the best description I’ve ever heard…and I’m strangely jealous that you have a better idea of it than I do, and that you said it with such conviction. Like you already knew what it felt like and you already had what I wanted. It wasn’t just jealousy of what you had though, it was the stirring of something I’d never felt before in my life. Confusing and brilliant all at once, just like you.. I don't know how long we have exchanged erotic chats and emails, long enough that we have become friends that have discussions about other things. We have shared with each other tales of the good and the bad discussing things trivial like all friends do, these are some of great pleasures of now being friends. Life is funny sometimes though, we have discussed the ideas of how we might have a chance to meet and if we did, what those times would be like. The miles between us are far enough to make it difficult and yet close enough to make it plausible. By chance I would be driving right through town on trip that puts my destination about 70 miles past where my friend lives. The chance to actually meet her becomes clear, yet will it be too late? We have been busy and our times to write have been sporadic. I write the email, knowing there is a slim chance that it will be read in the time I need to make arrangements to stop. To my surprise as the window of chance to see a.
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